Raising bilingual children: 7 myths South African parents still hear
Will two languages confuse your child or delay their speech? We bust seven common myths about raising bilingual children in South Africa, with what research says.
By the Asifunde Nathi team · 6 min read
"Speak only English to her, or she'll get confused at school." If you are raising a child in South Africa, you have probably heard some version of this, from a relative, a neighbour, or even a teacher.
It is well-meant advice, but most of it is wrong. In a country where most children grow up with at least two languages, these myths can lead families to give up a home language they never needed to lose. Here are seven of the most common, and what the evidence actually says.
In this article
- Myth 1: Two languages will confuse my child
- Myth 2: Bilingual children start talking later
- Myth 3: Mixing languages means my child is confused
- Myth 4: Dropping the home language will improve my child's English
- Myth 5: It's too late (or too early) to start
- Myth 6: I can't teach my child a language I don't speak perfectly
- Myth 7: My child will pick it up anyway
- What actually helps
- How Asifunde Nathi helps
- Questions parents ask
Myth 1: Two languages will confuse my child
The reality: Children are built for more than one language. Across the world, growing up bilingual or multilingual is normal, not the exception. The American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA) says plainly that learning two languages does not cause speech or language problems, and that bilingual children build language skills in the same way as children learning one language.
Babies can tell the difference between languages from very early on. Children quickly learn which language to use with which person: isiZulu with Gogo, English with their teacher, Sepedi with a cousin. That is not confusion. It is skill.
Myth 2: Bilingual children start talking later
The reality: According to ASHA's guidance, most bilingual children say their first words around their first birthday and use two-word phrases by age 2, the same milestones as children learning one language.
What can look like a delay is often just a different picture. A bilingual child might know 30 words in isiXhosa and 30 different words in English. Count only one language and they seem behind. Count both and they are right on track.
Some children go through a "silent period" when a new language is introduced, such as when they start an English-medium crèche. This is normal and temporary. However, if your child is struggling to communicate in both languages, speak to a speech therapist. Bilingualism does not cause language difficulties, but it does not hide them either.
Myth 3: Mixing languages means my child is confused
The reality: When a child says "Mama, I want amanzi", they are not confused. They are using every word they know to get their message across. Mixing grammar or words from two languages is described by ASHA as a normal part of bilingual development.
Adults do it too. Listen to any conversation in a South African office, taxi or shopping centre and you will hear people switching between languages mid-sentence. Linguists call this code-switching, and it is a sign of skill, not weakness.
The best response is simply to model the full sentence in the home language: "Ufuna amanzi? Nanka amanzi." No correction needed.
Myth 4: Dropping the home language will improve my child's English
The reality: This is perhaps the most damaging myth, because it asks families to give up something precious for no gain.
A strong home language actually supports English. Children who understand concepts like "more", "under" or "because" in their home language only need to learn a new label in English, not a new idea. That is why the Department of Basic Education's Mother Tongue-based Bilingual Education programme is extending home-language teaching beyond Grade 3. The department notes that Grade 4, the year most learners switch to English, is when the achievement gap between children taught in their home language and those taught in a second language appears.
There is also a practical risk. If a parent who is not fully comfortable in English switches to English only, the child gets a smaller, simpler version of language than they would have heard in the parent's strongest language. Children benefit most from rich, warm, fluent conversation, in whatever language the parent speaks best.
Myth 5: It's too late (or too early) to start
The reality: There is no wrong age. Babies and toddlers soak up the sounds of a language, and young children pick up pronunciation easily. Older children and teens learn vocabulary and grammar faster and can use reading to help. Starting earlier is easier, but starting later is far better than never.
Myth 6: I can't teach my child a language I don't speak perfectly
The reality: You do not need to be perfect to pass on a language. Many South African parents grew up in English-medium schools and feel unsure of their isiZulu, Setswana or Tshivenda. Your child does not need you to be a teacher. They need you to be a fellow learner.
Use songs, picture books, stories and apps with correct pronunciation. Ask grandparents and relatives to help. Say, "Let's find out together." That is the spirit of Asifunde Nathi: let's learn together.
Myth 7: My child will pick it up anyway
The reality: Children do not absorb a language automatically just because it is around them. They need to use it. Many South African children understand their home language perfectly but cannot speak it, because everyone around them has slipped into English.
Keeping a home language strong takes a little intention: a daily routine in the language, stories, songs, and gently inviting children to answer in it. Read our guide on why children lose their home language for a simple weekly plan.
What actually helps
- Use your strongest language for rich, everyday conversation.
- Be consistent. A daily home-language routine matters more than the number of hours.
- Read and tell stories in the home language. See bedtime stories in African languages.
- Give the language status. Praise it, celebrate it, use it with pride.
- Involve family. Grandparents are a treasure. Read how grandparents can keep a language alive.
- Watch for real difficulties. If your child struggles in both languages, ask a professional.
How Asifunde Nathi helps
Asifunde Nathi supports bilingual families with short, playful activities in nine South African languages for children aged 2 to 10, including words, reading, numbers, money, logic games and bedtime stories. The Parent Centre shows you how your child is growing across skills. Start a free 7-day trial.
Learning that speaks their language
Games, stories and a weekly plan in nine South African languages, for ages 2 to 10. Free for 7 days.
Questions parents ask
Should each parent speak a different language?
Many families use "one parent, one language", where each parent consistently speaks their own language. It works well, but it is not the only way. Some families use one language at home and another outside, or switch by time of day. Consistency matters more than the exact system.
My child refuses to speak our home language. What should I do?
Avoid pressure and punishment. Make the language fun and useful: games, songs, time with relatives who only speak that language, and lots of praise for every attempt. Refusal is usually a confidence issue and often passes.
Does bilingualism make children smarter?
Researchers have reported benefits such as flexible thinking and attention control in some studies, though findings vary. The clearest benefits are practical and personal: connection to family and culture, and real advantages in South Africa's multilingual job market.
When should I worry about my bilingual child's speech?
If your child is not using single words by about 18 months, not combining words by about 2 years, or is struggling to communicate in both languages, speak to your clinic, paediatrician or a speech-language therapist.
